I haven't been posting lately because I haven't been doing much lately. I've mostly been moping around the house doing nothing and feeling bad about it. The good news is that I think my moping days are nearing an end. The bad news is that it’s been very easy to ignore my projects and my obligations, so easy that I feel a bit overwhelmed by all I have to do now. I’m testing the waters again and starting out slowly.
So slowly, in fact, that going to the grocery store on Sunday was an accomplishment. And putting new sheets on the bed was an accomplishment. Ok, so I took the sheets off the bed but forgot to wash them so I slept on a blanket last night…but I’ll wash them tonight. Yes, I only have one set of sheets because I think sheets are too expensive and I don’t like buying them on principle.
Another accomplishment: I made banana bread! I took a few slices, some strawberries and my book and read in bed for a few hours. Then I took a nap. Before that, though, I dug through one of my many piles to find these pillowcases:
My mom embroidered them for my birthday last summer. I’ve wanted to embroider pillowcases for a long time but it’s something I just never seem to make time for. Perhaps it’s because I don’t have a comfy spot to sit and embroider since I don’t have a couch. Perhaps my hatred of expensive bedding prevents me from buying the pillowcases in the first place. Perhaps I don’t know if the pillowcases should be pre-washed to avoid shrinking after the embroidery is finished or if the embroidery floss will shrink too, in which case, maybe I shouldn’t pre-wash.
All I know is that these are silly things that keep me from a hobby that I enjoy. I also know that feeling mopey is a silly reason to let the rest of my life fall to pieces. I know it’s to be expected at times in our lives but I’m getting tired of feeling out of control.
And, most importantly, I know that there’s someone out there who loves me no matter what. Someone who does things only moms can do in the special way only moms know how. It makes everything just a little easier.
It also helps to have all of you out there, showing me who you are and letting me show you who I am. I truly appreciate all of you who've been there for me when I haven't been feeling up to my usual self. I definitely heart you guys!